Once Upon a Time S03E22: There's No Place Like Home

Season Finale! I hear there's a twist.

Ugh. Is the twist that Neal is coming back to life?

Oh I think there's one more episode after this.

Okay, who is this lady in the jail?

How did Red get her dress back on?

Rescuing that woman is obviously a bad idea and/or somehow significant. But WHO IS SHE?

Marion! Is it Maid Marion??

I don't remember where the dark fairy dust came from. Or what she eventually used it on.

Are they going to burn Snow White at the stake INSIDE?

"Yeah, that's her." Really? Charming can tell that the ladybug is Snow White? He met her like once.

I have enjoyed these two time travel episodes more than I enjoyed the entire past season.

If the mystery lady is Zelena in disguise I will be PISSED.

How did Regina know Snow was still alive?

Good thing Belle reminded us about this vault last episode!

They're being really careless with this lady. Obviously her family that thinks she's dead will be in Storybrooke.

That was a fun little romp.

Oh and this episode aired on Mother's Day, right?

Awww, the look on Rumplestiltskin's face when they revealed the baby's name. :)

Hooray for heterosexual couplings!

These vows are awfully long.

Yup. Totally Marion.

"I brought someone back from the past." Did she ever tell Regina she went to the past?

What is that?

OMG IT'S ELSA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Once Upon a Time S03E21: Snow Drifts

Haha, Emma accusing the Charmings of stalling for time in order to stall for time.

Regina's makeup in this scene with Robin Hood is like when she was younger. It's nice :)

When Belle finds out that Rumple lied she's going to be all like, "You lied to me!"

Hey! It's Ruby! We haven't seen her in forever.

And now Emma is going to change the past so that she's in it. Right?

But obviously Snow and Charming will get together otherwise Emma would, like, disappear.

Ooooh, is this the Orphan Black episode of Once Upon a Time?

Ha! Princess Leia! That's good.

None of these dresses are in the right style. They all look like 90s prom dresses.

Snow left her box at the foot of the wall.

Of course killing these guards makes no difference to anyone in the future, right?

Is this the first time we've really seen Emma's chest/cleavage?

Once Upon a Time S03E20: Kansas

Fighting evil big-bads isn't what makes this show interesting. I hope they get that for next season.

Aww, Dorothy's hour didn't crush anyone.

Zelena is really dumb. Also, why hasn't anyone tried to just melt her with water?

Regina is the only good thing about this episode.

How did they know about the jewel?

Ugh, what are they going to do to get rid of Zelena? Because I don't want her anymore.

Oh good, Regina threatened to crush Zelena's heart. So she's not ALL good.

I don't think your crypt is so safe anymore, Regina. Everyone knows about it.

Awww, poor Hook.

What? Why did she turn to porcelain? Oh well. At least she's gone.

But seriously, Rumple? You lie to Belle and ask her to marry you?

Wait, so is this green fog Zelena? Is she still out there? Uggghhhhhh

Once Upon a Time: S03E19: A Curious Thing

Oh look, the traditional Snow White haircut. It looks terrible.

Aurora got turned into a monkey?? This is the perfect time for Mulan to come back.

The kiss-curse on Hook has been pretty useless, so why bother with it in the first place?

So they cast their own curse? Then how did Zelena know what was going on?

Sometimes Charming is, like, really eager to sacrifice himself.

Aw, this is actually kind of sad.

But there were no memories in the original curse?

Once Upon a Time S03E18

I'm really close to giving up on this show.

Like, Regina's eyebrows are one of the only reasons I'm still watching.

It's nice to see Rumple be dangerous again, even if it is against his will.

Hm. Didn't think we'd see Rose McGowan again.

Ooh, is this Zelena's father?

Good thing Snow just reminded us that her father's name was Leopold.


So Cora was engaged to Leopold and then later pawns her daughter off on him? How does Leopold not remember Cora when he marries Regina?

So did Zelena cast the second curse to get close to the baby?

Gee, they sure make it clear that Cora was selfish where Snow and Emma were selfless.

Once Upon a Time S03E17: The Jolly Roger

Actually, you do need a ship to be a pirate. Without a ship you're just a thief.

Oh Emma. Those wrinkles in your brow are going to become permanent if you keep frowning.

Hook is one of the only characters I enjoy watching anymore. Him and Regina.

Uh oh. The Charmings are going to try to be fun? (Well at least they've acknowledged hat they're fuddy duddies.)

BB is Blackbeard? I thought it would be Bilbo Baggins.

Hook is channeling some serious Jack Sparrow this episode.

Oooh! I love CGIed chasms!

Why Blackbeard? He's historical, not fictional. Surely they could have found a fictional pirate. Long John Silver, perhaps?

That can't be Blackbeard. Where is his beard?? (Is Eric the real Blackbeard?)

That was the worst Blackbeard I've ever seen.

Is this scene with Henry driving supposed to be comic?

Zelena pretending to be Ariel is a pretty stupid device.

Also, cursing Hook so that if he kisses Emma she loses her powers is also a stupid device.

Wait, so why did the spell Belle put on Eric's cape work? And why was Eric's cape in GOld's shop in the first place?

So did they off Neal just so they could advance the Hook/Emma plot? And does that mean that Hook and Emma will end up together? How boring.

Once Upon a Time S03E16: It's Not Easy Being Green

What a groaner of a title.

Wait, why couldn't Zelena help Cora become royalty?

What's the deal with this Oz guy? Is he just exposition?

He didn't say what she was supposed to bring back.

Why are Belle and Tink the new deputies?

This scene with Hook and Henry actually rings true emotionally for once.

I don't like seeing Rumple as Zelena's lapdog.

I don't like Zelena's character, either. She has no humanity. And she says her lines with too much...stupidness.

"Never bring your heart to a witch fight." HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I really like Regina and Robin together.

Once Upon a Time S03E15: Quiet Minds

Lumiere???  Blasphemy!! There is no Lumiere without Jerry Orbach.

Henry's voice is cracking faster than they can keep up.

The first thing they tell Neal isn't that he's lost a year, it's that his dad is back?

I like Belle's vest outfit, but Neal looks stupid with his leather neck ruffle.

Oh good, this episode hasn't had enough Regina.

Hook/Neal bro hug?? Didn't see that coming.

So are we going to get to watch Regina and Robin fall in love twice??

Listening to a candle sounds like a bad idea.

Rumple's vault is full of the black oil?

When did Neal almost marry a minion of Peter Pan? Wendy?

Is this some sort of Bugs Bunny thing? Neal is only dead if someone knows he is and he looks down?

So Neal melded into Rumple and drove him crazy?

Well that's the worst CGI fire I've ever seen.

I understand that this is supposed to sad, but I just can't seem to care.

I am glad we don't have to spend too much more time trying to figure out that Zelena is the witch.

Rumple's foundation looks a shade too orange.

So was Neal inside Rumple for the past year?

Once Upon a Time S03E14: The Tower

Oooh, a giant CGI castle!

Ouch. That dagger can't give a very good shave, I'm sure.

Okay. Who's her dad?

What was that thing in the jar? Petrified poop?

When did Charming work at an animal shelter?

Wait, so who's the queen of the castle now? Snow or Regina?

You have a sense of dread because babies are always bad news in fairy tales.

Uh oh. Is she going to make tea with tannis root?

"Here, let me tell you my story."

The witch is Sadako?

Now the camera zooms in on the tea mug JUST IN CASE YOU MISSED IT that it was spiked.

What's ironic about a farmhouse? Because Dorothy was from a farm? I don't get it.

Not Sadako, a Ring Wraith.

Is that supposed to be, like, Mrs. Gulch's bike?

It's like Link vs. Dark Link.

This whole Rapunzel thing is kind of a worthless  diversion.

Rapunzel's fear was like, really easy to defeat.

Geez. TV dads and their desire to protect their families.

"Sorry guys! False alarm. It wasn't the witch, it was just my own fear of being a failed father."

So Emma got the message that David thought he found the witch and she STILL went to pick up Regina first?

Wait, how long had she been in the tower? Since before the curse?

Ohhh is she going to steal someone else's brain? And then someone's heart?

Why does Regina look so pleased?

Once Upon a Time S03E13

This blog post is brought to you by Anne's Hulu+ account.

I would not want a toy that could potentially turn back into a vicious flying monkey.

Robin Hood was in Storybrooke? I thought he was one of the people who got left behind? Or was everyone transported to Storybrooke the second time around? Like, Aurora and Mulan, too?

Sometimes I'm not sure if the show has continuity errors or if I just don't remember stuff.

Yay for the beginning of the Regina/Robin pairing. What portmanteau are the shippers using? Regina Hood? Robina?

But Cora was killed in Storybrooke. (Wasn't she?) Why would her crypt be in the Enchanted Forest?

So the Wicked Witch wants to get her hands on Snow's baby? Is that the reason for the curse? And why is it taking Henry so long to grab his coat?

It's kind of confusing that the woods around Storybrooke look exactly the same as the woods in the Enchanted Forest.

Oooh, I wonder if Robin is into choking. That would be a good match.

She plans to use it on herself, duh.

Her boobs look so great in that dress.

But her hair looks awesome-r in Storybrooke.

"I'm not well-verse in cons." Srsly, Rgna?

Grumpy is so fucking dramatic.

Well surely you saw it coming once he started to grow a tail, right?

She didn't need to break the blood magic, you left the door open!

Ooh, are they sisters?

They're sisters.

So it IS personal. Bo-ring.

So Rumple only really stayed dead for one whole episode. Typical. (But good, I like Rumple)

Once Upon a Time S03E12: New York City Serenade

They really dropped the ball by not time-stamping that "One Year Ago" as "Once Upon a Year Ago"

Are those just fancy city park trash cans with fires in them? They totally are. Is Sleeping Beauty a hobo??

Emma has a date? With this shrimpy guy?

Is he going to propose?

Ooh neck scar. What's the story there?

I would totally take the pirate over shrimpy guy.

He proposed with an ice cream sundae? Talk about milquetoast. (And I say that as someone who loves ice cream.)

And he owns a furniture shop? He must be a bad guy in disguise as a mediocre guy.

"He's okay" isn't really a glowing endorsement for a stepfather.

So in this retconned memory Emma told Henry the truth about his dad.

I thought Jiminy Cricket spoke English...

Wait, so Snow and Charming, who are always about finding a way back to each other, won't let Neal see if there's any possibility that there's a way to get back to Emma?

Ooh, nice plaid pants, Emma.

The curse was retconned, but shouldn't Neal have still stayed in the real world?

I love that pronunciation of parents. "Perents."

I cannot believe the police went along with that plan. "I'm going to go meet with this guy that assaulted me and then you arrest him. Deal?"

I thought they retook the castle before they got married? Was that a different castle?

Those are some fab lashes, Regina.

Aww, she said "our" castle.

The whole show had been about getting Emma to believe. So now they're rehashing that.

They had better explain where Hook got that potion. (Rumple?)

When the curse hit, Belle was Regina's prisoner, not wearing a pretty purple dress. (And what shade is that lipstick??)

Regina must have a powerful Aquanet spell for that coif.

I knew it!

Wait. Walsh was a flying monkey? Not even a person? That is weird. Like. Emma had sex (I assume) with a flying monkey.

Are...are those shoulder ruffles?

Emma & Henry VS. Norma & Norman: FIGHT!

Okay, but if they go to Maine who is going to pay their rent?

Oh yes. She needs her red leather jacket. It has powers.

I thought Storybrooke was supposed to have disappeared? Are they going to actually explain this or am I just supposed to accept it? It could go either way with this show...

I don't understand yet what the downside of this new curse is.

They really didn't want to have to make a plot of getting Emma to believe again, do they. So they magicked it away. I guess with this show they can do that.

 That is one terrible CGI monkey.

This really just feels like a new season. How many episodes are left? And then what?

Once Upon a Time s03E11: Going Home

My computer crashed mid-episode and I lost my notes for the first half. Bah humbug. Something about Henry's dorky voice, some timeline inconsistencies, and Emma being astonished.

• Quit monologuing, Rumple.
• Why is the only way for Pan to die for both him and Rumple to die? Also, no way that dagger went through both of them.
• Take a shot every time anyone says "Happy Ending"
• That is some bad CGI glowing effect on that dagger.
• This parting would be a lot more dramatic if I thought it would be for good. But that's just not the nature of this show.
• Regina is going to give Emma a happy ending?? It's the moment we've been waiting for the entire series!!
• I'd be okay with it if Hook showed up at my door.

Once Upon a Time S03E10: The New Neverland

• If it was so easy to release Rumple from Pandora's Box, why do they think it will hold Pan?
• Snow kinda walks all over Charming sometimes.
• Charming/Emma daddy/daughter moments are nice
• What's really evil about Pan is that he won't let this story arc end.